Here and Gone


People are dropping out of my life at a rapid rate.

Three  days ago a friend went for her morning walk, and instead of returning home, she went to heaven….via a bus. I’m having a difficult time comprehending that.

The absence of others is not so dramatic, but just as incomprehensible.

Different instances giving different meaning to three little words…here and gone.

I cannot lean on my own understanding.

On The Sidewalk of Life


On Monday of this week, I had the sad opportunity to attend the funeral of a fifty-two-year-old young man who was a long-time member of my church. Andrew was the epitome of good nature, good deeds, and good looks. He was also the recipient of ominous cardiovascular genetics. His father and brother both died of this deadly disease at a very early age. Although his mother also had the gene, she did live a longer life, and Andrew became her solitary caregiver after she suffered a stroke in her early seventies.

This young man took care of his mother in the same way she cared for him as a child. He was always by her side, taking her to movies, out to dinner, to church functions, and to church every Sunday. When Andrew smiled, it lit up a room; when he laughed, it could be heard clear across Scarborough, and if Andrew cried, nobody heard it.

And his good works didn’t stop with his mother. On one occasion, I met Andrew when he was shopping at a Superstore where I had just purchased a patio set of table, four chairs and an umbrella. Seeing me trying to cram this whole set into my little Kia Magentis, totally without success, Andrew promptly pulled his van up behind me and loaded my patio furniture into it. “Where to, Patricia?” he asked with his famous brilliant smile. He followed me to my house, unloaded my set, and offered to put it all together for me. But I declined that extra service and sent him on his way, with a huge hug of thanks, to get his mother’s groceries. Not long after that, Andrew’s mother suffered a major stroke which ended her life, and saw him handle the final act of seeing to his mom’s last wishes.

That’s how Andrew walked the sidewalk of life. Everything he did was from the goodness of his heart; one that never functioned physically the way it was meant to.

After his mother’s death, Andrew began admitting to having problems with his heart. In spite of that, he picked up the pieces of life without his mom, and carried on living with a new sense of freedom, when he wasn’t in hospital for one procedure or another.

And then Andrew was gone. A massive heart attack took him in his sleep. I’m told he knew his days were numbered, but not for one moment do I believe that he gave in to self pity. I’m told that on his final day on earth, he mentioned to a neighbour that he wasn’t feeling well but went about filling the bird bath and feeder so that his feathered friends were looked after. That’s the kind of guy he was.

As the clergyman who did his funeral service told us, this good natured young man got off the sidewalk of life and onto the stairway to Heaven.  And he only did so after a final act of kindness.

Can you imagine how many angels were waiting for Andrew at the top of that stairway?

 

 

 

 

Dying to Live


A dear friend told me yesterday that her oncologist and other doctors have told her “there’s nothing more we can do for you.” And so sent her home to die. She is a beautiful, vibrant woman between middle age and the “golden years”, and in my opinion, too young to have that prognosis.

And so I began to think about this thing called death: how it comes to every single one of us. No one can escape life without experiencing it, and no one can do anything about it. It is our final act of living. What comes afterwards depends totally on what we believe. I choose to believe that although it is our final act on earth, it is not our final act. The curtain may come down, but is drawn up again–for the encore, if you will. (John 3:16) And to me that is super exciting and worth a round of applause.

What we can do something about is the way we live our lives before the final curtain.

Is there some good we can do? Let’s do it.

Is there some habit to break? Let’s break it.

Is there some wrong we have done? Let’s right it.

Is there animosity to be dealt with? Let’s deal with it.

Is jealousy hurting relationships? Let’s trade it for trust.

Is selfishness a problem? Let’s give until it hurts.

Is a dark mood plaguing our happiness? Let’s try to work through it.

Is someone being hurt by our behaviour? Let’s change our behaviour.

Is our life reflecting true love? Let’s make sure it does.

In all life we should try to remember what is commonly known as “the golden rule”:  So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you…Matthew 7:12. (KJV ) It is so important to remember this.

There are those of us who will do some soul searching, and those who won’t. How will you pave your road to death, and your path to Heaven?

To get back to my friend, she is in fact, dying with dignity, yet still searching for life through alternative ways to kill the cancer that is killing her.

She has discovered the truth of true friendship through the generosity of those who care so much about her, that they are doing everything to help her really live her life to the end.

She is one of the bravest women I know: while facing her own mortality, she is thinking of others, and laying the groundwork for their wellbeing after she is gone.

I’m hoping she will tell her own story on my blog in a few days, if she’s up to it, but in the meantime, may I ask for world-wide prayers for this dear soul who is dying to live?

A Heavenly Message


It was June 29, 2007, when Jerry, my second partner in life for twenty-seven years, traded life on this planet for life in Heaven. Maxine, his part-time caregiver, called me on July 2nd to tell me that she had a dream about me the night before. She said that I told her to read the Bible, and vaguely recalled Psalm 2 and Hebrews 5. Intrigued, I opened my Bible to Psalm 2, but it didn’t speak to me. I then turned to Hebrews 5, and read in verse five, “You are my Son; today I have become your Father.” That sounded familiar, so I went back and read Psalm 2 again. Sure enough, in verse seven, I read, “You are my Son; today I have become your Father.” The next thing I knew, I was writing the following poem.

TODAY I AM YOUR FATHER

Your life on earth has ended,

Your new life has begun,

Today I am your Father,

Today you are my son.

Your gentle heart stopped beating,

You breathed your final breath,

And because I am your Father,

You’ve won victory over death.

Well done, my faithful servant,

You struggled, not in vain,

For now you’re safely home with me,

Your new life free from pain.

I whispered, “Gerald, come to me.”

You answered, “Lord, I come.”

Today I am your Father

Welcome Home, my son.

©2007

I love it when my dreams speak to me, but when someone else’s dreams speak to me, I’m left incredulous.